Self-Realization

Instead of introducing myself, I’d like to tell you about one of the first moments I knew that my life was going to change forever. It was a very spiritual encounter that made me understand that I really needed to change my life. So, it meant defining who “I” really was and what “my” purpose was. This would eventually push me into a spiritual yoga path and help me to answer a very broad but intense question: Who am I?

Let’s begin.

It happened to be a low moment in my life. I was in a very toxic intimate relationship and we were giving it “another” go for probably the 10th time in as little as 1 and 1/2 years. On this particular day, I had not slept well because I’d been arguing with my partner. The next morning , in a desperate attempt to salvage the situation, I called him to make amends. But I was already on the receiving end of what would be another 5 day silent treatment stint with other added-in psychological abuse.

I began heading to work this particular day in the neighborhood of Gracia, Barcelona. It was a beautiful, sunny day in February but I was very sad and emotional. As was my habit in these frequent situations, I felt distraught, hopeless and glum about the future. I felt scared and anxious. Both were habitual thought patterns and feelings. I couldn’t stop going over things in my head, crying, and feeling in general, well, very crap.

In route, I was suddenly stopped by tourist. He asked how to arrive to Parque Guell. As I was indicating with my hands where to go, he observed them in deep concentration and proceeded to ask me if he could look at them. I was a bit taken aback and surprised, but in an instant I had to decide if I was willing to engage with this stranger and adhere to this sudden request. He began to explain that he was very involved in reiki, yoga, and all this “stuff” I had always thought to be very wishy-washy. He looked into my eyes, and he said,

“I should read your palms.”

I believe if it were another moment in my life, I would have let my judgement get in the way. I would have called him crazy and walked away. But something about that moment, this man, and the way he looked at me, allowed me to open my mind and agree to this reading. As he said to me at the end of our palm reading:

Esto no es una casualidad, es una CAUSUALIDAD.”

Which means, there is no such thing as coincidence, everything that happens is meant to happen. These small miracles in life are our destiny – they are quite literally written in the stars to happen.

There are many other details of this event that unfolded- we sat in a park, he read my palms, we talked about yoga and books and youtube videos about the “divine being”. He told me about my life, how I felt, my hardships, my pain (which was all profoundly spot on) and also my dreams and what I would go on to accomplish them that same year (which also did happen).

The most important message he gave me, was that I had plugged in a way of thinking that was completely wrong. The only way to move forward was that I must unplug that way of thinking and plug-in something new. I had already begun to think about these things after I had read Ekhart Tolle’s “The Power of Now” just before meeting him. He was confirming that this was my new beginning but with certain sacrifices that lay ahead in order to change. It wouldn’t be easy, or simple. I had to end my toxic relationships & addictions, I had to stop resisting my vulnerability, I had to let go and allow my transformation to begin. Non-resitance.

I speak of this encounter with love and tenderness – it is a moment that forever changed me. It was truly an act of God to meet this person. I also let the door open to allow my world to be different. In slowly allowing myself to be non-resistant, that door of intrigue and monumental change creaked open. As soon as I started to believe in the power of the universe, in “God”, in yoga, and in “miracles”, many other spontaneous spiritual things happened to me that same year and have continued to happen ever since.

My gradual “transformation” to “yogi” is still in process. It was not overnight, nor will it be finished in this lifetime. As I see it, for every being on this planet, transformation is continuous and the process of self-realization is a lifelong process.

Many things happened from that moment until I began my Yoga certification course, but on one of the first days, my beautiful Yoga instructor, Katya Devi said to us:

“Raja Yoga is the process of self-realization.”

Destiny was knocking again. She taught me to travel into my interior or my “inner-self” to be able to connect with the universe. This is the purpose of yoga, which means “union” of self with the cosmic universe. In another sense, right your way of thinking, acting, believing and you can connect with divine. These are all founding principles of yoga which can also be seen in the “Yamas” and “Niyamas” – the first steps of the “8 limbs of Yoga” as stated in The Yoga Sutras of Pantañjali : the building blocks for a foundation in Yoga to guide you to enlightenment.

So, instead of telling you who I am, I can tell you where I started and what that truly means to me in relation to yoga. We are all floating atoms vibrating at certain frequencies in this giant universe- we are essentially all the same. But my purpose is to help guide you in your own yoga path- be it for whatever reason. In sharing my knowledge and information, I hopes that you too will begin a path in yoga, whatever small incorporation into your lifestyle that may be!

Remember that discovering who you are might change many times throughout your own life and even reincarnate to another life. But you might also want to start asking yourself: Who am “I”?

Thank you for reading.

Namaste.

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